A LETTER TO MY FUTURE HUSBAND

This one’s for The Man Who Will One Day Become My Soul-Mate in Crime *wink.

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Dear future Husband of mine,

How are you, mi loveness? I’m not totally sure what my purpose in writing this letter is; I guess I just really wanted to talk to you. It’s so weird that I haven’t met you and I’m writing you, right? Well... I have sooo many things I wanna say to you and gist you about and I don’t even know how to coordinate those thoughts and make them rhyme. So, this letter may seem all over the place, just be attentive, you’ll understand, because you’re sooo super smart...mwaaah.

Right now, my love life is rather lacklustre and I am heart-broken right now, I'll gist you... but I’m not embarrassed one bit about it or ashamed of not having a serious relationship (or a string of silly relationships). That mostly has to do with my determination not to date someone *just* to date them. I want more than that from my love life and I know you’re absolutely worth the wait.

I’m not your typical girl.  I can hold my own in just about anything and I love showing people how strong I can be.  It’s how I was raised.  But my best friends can attest to how much of a fighter I’m not and how vulnerable I can be. Early on, letting down those brazen walls and letting someone - anyone in was very tough; but over time, I’ve seen myself grow, mature, and heal (from many things). I’m like the wine that gets better with age, I’ve seen me get better and I can only get better because Proverbs 4:18 tells me ‘the older I grow, the better I become’.

My Momma thinks you’ll LOVE pounded yam, but I’ve taken that specifically to God in prayers… no causeless curse shall stand mehn….lol. Don’t get me wrong o, I can pound, besides who has to actually pounds these days with all the new food processors… You’re so worth pounding yam for my Honey but you know pounded yam contains toooooo many calories, like 5 billion…. And we like to eat healthy, because our waistlines have to stay intact, shebi? hehe… 

By the way, I hope you you love food enthusiastically, because I love cooking but I'm such an un-enthusiastic eater, so there’s gotta be someone who will eat all the food.

Please talk to me and talk often. I’m a very reasonable girl. I’ll understand, well, most of the time, trust me. You can tell me anything, I can handle anything (I’m tough like that, thank you, thank you, no pictures :)), anything but lies. I’m a very dangerous person to be lied to, because I’ll always know without even trying to find out (yes, I’m an aje Jesu ...lol). But seriously, I’m not one of those girls who like to be ‘lied’ to. If I don’t look so nice on a certain day, I’ll want you to tell me. If there’s this new ‘sexy chic’ in your office you’re tripping for, please tell me. Be honest, even when it’s not popular. Make me your best friend, your wingman, your confidant. I promise you will not regret it *on my Lydia Auxiliary’s honour…* ... *adjusts halo*...lol

Also, please listen to me. Sometimes I’ll be very chatty, and plaayyyyful, sometimes not-so-chatty. I won’t always make sense, sometimes I’ll be all glum and not be able to put what’s wrong in words, please just be patient with me, I’ll come round, I always do.  Laugh with me. When I’m hurt and grieving, grieve with me; you don’t necessarily have to shed physical tears, sometimes you might have to but the most important thing is I’ll like to feel your warmth in my heart. Be my best friend.

DO NOT ‘let’ me win at ping pong or at tennis or at PES13 or at scrabble or even at golf (yup, I started ‘pro bono’ golf classes on Monday April 14th 2014…yayyy) …play all you know to play and still watch me beat you handsdown… Powwww! *tongue out. 

One thing that’s absolutely mandatory is that you’re on fire for God. Lead me closer to God. Remind me why I love Jesus by simple acts of your faith. Be a real man. Be a man of prayer. Pray with me every day and share what God is teaching you, with me. You’re my priest, the spiritual leader of our home; surround our home in God's love, the sound of joy and the ready promise of laughter. I will follow you and be your helper.

 I want you to know that I’m already in love with Jesus, so if you want me, you’ll have to ask him first. I’m a handful o, but I was made just for you, and you, for me.  And I have a God that is crazy in love with me. So, when you ask Him for me, just realize that you’re asking for a crazy crazy crazy, hardworking, strong, soft, accountable, reasonable, emotional, loving, devoted, adventurous, artistic, imperfect, helplessly romantic girl that has the capacity to love and care deeply for you.

I know that one day you will make an absolutely wonderful father.  Never forget that, even if your father wasn’t the best (or maybe he was/is amazing), you can be a spectacular one, so long as you trust God to lead you to be the father and leader He wants you to be. 

Find your dream(s) and chase hard in their direction, be visionary. Take my hand and I'll run with you. I will fly with you. let that sink in...Care about my interests, support me in my dreams. But tell me when I'm stumbling down the wrong path. 

 I’m not asking for a perfect, storybook romance. A couple that doesn’t fight have nothing going on for them. We will never be a perfect couple.  Our relationship, like our lives, will be full of peaks and valleys. So don’t worry about getting in my face about something we disagree on. When the storms of life inevitably tremble the timbers of our home and threaten to rattle the foundation of our love, during those hard times and days when it seems almost not worth it; I want you to remember we are in it together FOREVER. I want you to remember why you love me and why you asked me to marry you.  I need you to trust that the good times far outweigh the bad and as it says in Romans 8:18, '...the bad times can’t compare to the good that is coming'.

 There will be days when I don’t express my love to you as much as I should.  There will be days when we have disagreements or arguments about this or that.  There is no such thing as a perfect marriage, but there is such thing as a healthy one through the power and love of Jesus.  We can work through anything so long as we both are willing, and Love, I am so willing.

I won’t always be easy to love; I might sometimes shoot down your compliments without trying to. When I’m most pessimistic, I might just be a heap of tears on the floor. Sometimes, it may be really hard for you to lead me. I might drive you insane with my crazy ideas. I might weird you out with my strange habits. I might confuse you to kingdom come with my dichotomy of a personality. But I can promise you that I will love you always (even when it’s nearly impossible).  It might be outrageously difficult to love me, sometimes but I promise to do my best to make every moment of it worth your while. I’ll do the best I can for you. I’ll cook your meals, even pound for you (on your birthdays and maybe Christmas), and love our family with every fiber I have. I’ll pray for you and with you. I’ll lift you up when your heart is broken. I’ll make you very happy. It is 'all or nothing' for me.

I am so thankful that you will one day be in my life.

I’m extremely curious to find out what my new last name will be… Just guess all the last names that have been coming to my mind: Scott, Carter, Morgan, Shane, Smith, Gates, LivingStone…loool. Future hubby, you’re not an oyinbo, are u? If you’re an oyinbo, you’ll have to tan/whatever and turn black niyen o, we don’t want you giving my Dad a heart attack jo nitori Oloun…  lol

I’m a helpless romantic; and we all know there are few things more romantic than a surprise… (just thought you should know... PS: I don't like Chinese food o, so please don't make reservations at 'Zen' or 'Golden Tulip' *sigh*).

Please love TV, and movies and music, (but not all the stuff I love, ah mean... where’s the fun in that?)... Please know how to dance so at least one of us knows what we’re doing because I have absolutely no rhythm in my feet, – AT ALL. I've tried but apparently, Juliet packed all the Adeboye Dancing Genes *straight face*, but I love to dance in the kitchen when I think no one’s looking sha... Please be adventurous too, I’ll most definitely love to have an accomplice on my ‘30by30’ escapade.

All in all, I pray that God gives me someone amazing and that I am as good for you as you will be for me. I know He will bring us together when the time is right, but while I wait; my focus now is to become a Proverbs 31 woman for you, the kind of woman you need and deserve.

I have no idea who you may be, where you may live or what you may do, but I am so thankful that you will one day be in my life; you are the answer to my prayers and my mum’s prayers. I pray that you use this time to become a man of honour, and one who will one day become the leader of our household.

I’m great with mums, well, that’s the word on the streets …*pops collar* so don’t worry about me and your Mum, we’ll be great friends. You know why I know? Because my Mum and I have spoken to God about her so many times.

Note that all my brazen, wooden, metal, concrete defense and anger come crashing down with the simplest, thoughtful ‘I’m Sorry’. That's the one thing I’ve really tried to be immune to…*sigh... but at the same time, never forget that 'sorry' doesn't fix everything. 

 It has taken all my courage and about a whole month to put this letter together, because I've been sorta shy about putting myself out there. There is sooooo much more to say, but I'll say all that and more when we meet.

WITH ALL MY LOVE I HAVE YET TO GIVE,

FOREVER AND ALWAYS,

PIA

**PS: If it wasn't for Nana Omotesho, I would have deleted this post the very day I published it:)... I love love love that woman. She's a rockstar!
Tweaked a lil today 10 sept 2015