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Age Is NOT Just a Number, But...

I, Agbeke Adefunke Adeboye will totally date/marry someone 20years older...


HAPPY NEW YEAR FAM!!!
I know. I know… and I have no excuse. Absolutely none!
In my defense, I actually started to write a couple of times but then I either lost the document(s) or somehow, I just didn't get round to completing them… I’m so sorry. I promise, it will be better this year. (yeah, I know today’s date already...hehe)

Okay, let’s get straight to the meat of the matter… I recently met 2 really REALLY cool guys (at different times)…

They love God, can strike and keep a conversation, downright intelligent, well-read and travelled, driven, down-to-earth, thoughtful, spontaneous, one of them even likes Mercedes, and all those nice things BUT, he’s 40ish - both of them.

So for the first time, I actually really gave it some thought, very serious thought o, like: “I could totally date/marry someone up to 20 years older than me”

*dodges slaps and stones…lol

Easy… easy… I can explain...

Ahmean! Are you saying If I’m totally single and ‘available’ and I meet a really cool guy that I really like and who really likes me  and I feel a nudge in my spirit and peace to go ahead, and I’m say 23,  I should say no to him just ‘cos he’s 20 years older? Because society thinks he’s old enough to be my father?

I’m sorry!

Oh Yeah, we’ll have a looooot of ‘talking about it’ to do, but… I’m sorry you guys, I'm so in!!!

I’m not saying I’m into old men, naaa not at all! In fact, I like ‘em young n fresh… but for laughing out loud, whether you’re a man or a lady, if you meet someone really ‘all-the-things-you-want-in-your-life’, and y’all have put all your cards on the table and you’re both showing hearts and y’all have spoken about all ‘em ‘curves and edges’ and you’re ready to live with them, then wetin remain?

Society, especially ours, holds such a negative stigma regarding age differences, we obsess over it so much; in simple terms, we take it P bajebaje and leave the very important things…

…I remember after my intense soul-searching which brought about this glorious ‘rhema’, I shared it on my BBM and my other social media platforms and the reaction I got… over-friggin-whelming…loool. For example, my BFF, Bunmi pinged me immediately “Ore, sho gbadun?...”, someone else: “you don find sugar daddy abi? You’re now trying to find an excuse…”, Iyinolu: “I just thank God for Mr *, if not you would have just made too many stupid mistakes, you this geh”…and so many others.

I discovered that everyone was thinking about all the cons (‘divorcee’, ‘widower’, kids, generational difference, social difference, *relatability*, ‘he’ll be domineering and jealous’, ‘he will die wayyyy before you and you will have to raise your kids alone’, ‘everyone will think you’re a gold-digger’, dadadadada…) *sigh. I definitely agree that there are cons, plenty of them, I will be such a *sometin I don’t know* to turn a blind eye to all the cons there could possibly be. But my point is: It. Can’t. Be. That. Bad! THERE MUST BE PROS TOO, PEOPLE!!!

I know they can be such kind beings and understanding and ‘secure’ and protective and Way-Past-Playing-Games’y, and realllly nice…
Just because someone is a certain age doesn’t necessarily box them to a certain status quo.

Like I said, I’m not dating someone 20 years older than me, and it’s not like I’m even thinking about either of those really cool baba 40’s I met or anything, Naaaaa, I’m just being the devil’s advocate here, so… please don’t judge me *music*

Even if you and your partner have the ‘ideal’ age difference and you’re not on the same page, things will be just as difficult.

I think the age thing basically depends on maturity. One can be 24 with the mindset of a 45-year-old or vice versa. For example, I think Genevieve Delatour (Remy’s mum and Zoila’s employer in Devious Maids) has the mindset of someone wayyyyy younger, I really like her but you know what it is…

I am by no means a Senior Special Adviser to anyone on Relationship Affairs, but ultimately, I think the choice of the special someone you want to be with should be made carefully and prayerfully. You don’t necessarily have to close yourself off based on the society’s sentiments. According to Mark Twain, 'If you don’t mind, then it doesn't really matter'.

In as much as I think if age were just a number (‘how old are you?’, ‘Number 30’. Lol how weird does that sound?), then jail is just a room; I also think we take it too seriously.

My name is Priscilla Adeboye and I’m pro LOVE and ROMANCE and FRIENDSHIP! Age? Age what? *wink

Love you guys.
Toodles….xxx

NB: Lance Gross, John Cusack, Bill Compton, ‘Dr Derek Shepherd’, Jamie Foxx, George Clooney, Russell Crowe, Denzel Washington, Brad Pitt, Will Smith, Idris Elba, Vin Diesel, are all over 40…. #selah



 Photo Credits: http://www.thedatereport.com; https://liverungrow.files.wordpress.com

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Comments

  1. Unknown2/01/2015 9:05 am

    Great write up! Arewa kudos

    ReplyDelete
  2. Pearl2/02/2015 7:05 pm

    I have always been an advocate of "forget the age,lets see the love" moreover d older they are,the more matured and ridiculously sweet they are. We all won't eat un ripe fruits,yeah? *just saying*

    ReplyDelete
  3. Unknown4/03/2015 5:59 pm

    Agbeke! Mind yourself. That's all!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Unknown5/09/2015 11:12 pm

    You rock gurl....I totally agree with you. Well done!

    ReplyDelete

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